


three times obi wan almost confesses his love, and the one time he does

by beneathstarryskies



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:01:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23224438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beneathstarryskies/pseuds/beneathstarryskies
Summary: Obi Wan has been in love with you since the beginning, but time after time he's failed to tell you. Finally he can't hide it anymore.
Relationships: Obi-Wan Kenobi & Reader, Obi-Wan Kenobi/Reader
Kudos: 163





	three times obi wan almost confesses his love, and the one time he does

The first time he almost tells you he loves you is right after the death of his master, Qui-Gon. The loss left a festering wound on his heart. Although Master Yoda advised him to rejoice for his master was now one with the force, he still struggled with his feelings as all humans (Jedi or not) do. No amount of training would ever help him to understand the complexity of grief or the load of extra emotions it often carries with it. When he closes his eyes, the moment of his master’s death replays behind his eyelids and he longs for peace. The longing for peace always seems to make his mind wander to you. 

After getting Anakin settled for the night (and promising to come back to check on him later) he finds himself walking to your quarters. He’s not surprised when you open the door before he even knocks. It’s silent as he crosses the room to the window. 

It’s difficult for you to see Obi Wan like this. The pain of the last few days covers his features like a black veil, and you know he would hate it if you mentioned how apparent his feelings are. He’s always stayed so guarded, but the events of the last few days have left him feeling raw. He feels like a lost little boy: small, vulnerable, and lost. He was exhausted from putting on a strong facade for the council, and especially for Anakin. You were the only person he would allow to see him like this, and he needed to feel safe for a moment. 

“I heard they made Anakin your padawan,” your voice is soft as you carefully approach the subject. You knew he came here to talk about it, but even in times like this Obi Wan’s pride requires him to be guided towards revealing his thoughts. 

“I promised Qui-Gon I would train the boy,” he crosses his arms over his chest. You can see his face change momentarily, an attempt to harden his face to hide his feelings.

You nudge him slightly, “Don’t hide from me, Obi Wan.” 

He lets out a sigh, hating to be called out but unable to deny it. 

“I’m worried I’m not ready,” he admits. 

“Of course you’re ready and he’s lucky to have you. You’ve always been the most clever and skilled of all the padawans our age.” 

Now it’s your turn to hide, as your admiration for him begins to spill. He simply lets out a small, slightly sarcastic chuckle. You fall into silence, watching the rain drops slide down the window. If there ever was a way for you to steal some of his pain away, to help him bear the burden of loss, you happily would do so. You assume being his friend is enough for now. 

“I know how much Qui-Gon meant to you,” you whisper. 

“I’m afraid he didn’t,” Obi Wan confesses. 

For the first time since his master’s death he allows himself to cry. You pull him into a tight embrace, and he’s convinced he might have fallen to pieces if you hadn’t. He is surprised to find himself gripping your waist to pull you closer. His face is buried in your soft hair, letting your warmth wash over him. He breathes you in, unable to pinpoint why it is he can’t seem to get close enough. He lifts his head from your shoulder, and cups your cheeks. His calloused thumb soothes across your cheek to wipe away a stray tear. Your eyes are filled with wonder at the sudden intimacy he’s showing you. He stares longingly at your parted lips, trying not to imagine the comfort he would get from tasting them. The words dance at the tip of his tongue. An ache he’s spent so long pushing away settles in the pit of his stomach. 

You reach up to touch his chest, “Obi Wan, what is it? You can talk to me.” 

His mind is a flurry of fears and wishes and fantasy. He knows if Qui-Gon were still alive, he would’ve been encouraged to explore his feelings. However, now he is under the scrutiny of the Jedi Council. One moment of weakness could cost him everything he worked for. He drops his hands to his side, and looked down at the small space between the two of you knowing he should broaden it. Instead he drops his hands to his sides. 

“Obi Wan, please. You can tell-” 

“I should go back to check on Anakin, it’s his first night here.” 

Your heart drops as he moves past you towards the door. 

“You know,” you begin causing him to pause in front of the door. “I was always a little envious that you got Qui-Gon as a master.” 

He tilts his head slightly in your direction, “Why is that?” 

“He never would expect you to hide your feelings.” 

“Thank you for seeing me,” he whispers before leaving you alone. 

-

The second time he almost confesses his love for you is the first time you successfully knocked him down during a sparring session. The two of you were constantly sparring when you were padawans, but you never were able to best him. Now you’re both Jedi Knights, and your skills are almost on par with one another. 

This time, you’d finally done it. Granted you fell with him when he reached to grab your arm, which wasn’t actually part of the plan. The two of you land on the rough sparring mat in a tangle of limbs and grunts. The neat braid you had your hair tied in brushes against Obi Wan’s face as the two of you wrestle until you’ve managed to pin him down. You hover above him, a devious smile playing on your lips as Obi Wan seems to give up. 

The way your fingers grip his robes and your eyes scan his face reawakens a desperate need he was once sure had been put to rest. In your moment of naivety, you blame his blushing on the embarrassment of being bested. 

“I win,” you declare. 

Obi Wan was suddenly aware of how warm you felt pressed against him. His hands rest on your calves, he toys with the idea of letting his hands make their way to your thighs just to see how you would react. 

“Yes, one time out of one hundred,” he teases you while trying to avoid looking at the plump curve of your lips.

“Don’t be a sore loser,” you tease him. 

“Let’s go again, and I’ll be easy on you this time,” you suggest with a smirk. 

“Ah, you’re unearned confidence is precious,” he teases. 

“You’re so smug,” you growl. 

You notice his green eyes filled with something you’d never seen in them before. You lean in, and decide to test the waters. You place a soft kiss on his cheek. His chest tightens as he waits in anticipation for your next move. Another kiss lands on the corner of his lips, his beard tickling your face. His hands move to grip your waist, subtly urging you not to stop. You plant a single soft kiss on his lips. He cups the back of your head, deepening the kiss. You only pull away to take a deep breath. Your lips are swollen from his kiss and a tinge of pink colors your cheeks. For the second time in his life, three little words threaten to slip from his lips. As he stares in awe at you, guilt seeps into your chest. You stand up abruptly, shaking your head. 

“I’m sorry, this shouldn’t have happened.” 

Without giving him a chance to say anything else, you leave him sitting on the floor of the training dojo. 

Anakin finally arrives with a getaway ship. It takes all of your strength and no small amount of force manipulation to pull Obi Wan through the door without either of you getting hit by blaster fire. You press the button to pull the door shut, and then yell at Anakin to fly away from the battle raging below.

-

It was Anakin’s idea to go on an impromptu rescue mission when Obi Wan was taken by General Grievous. Three days of torture proved useless as Obi Wan still refused to give up any information. Anakin couldn’t stand the constant transmissions of Obi Wan being tortured any longer, and the two of you went against the council despite knowing Obi Wan wouldn’t want that. 

You learned through an informant that Obi Wan was injected with some type of truth serum right before you slipped in to save him. Grievous had taunted Obi Wan with the fact that the serum had been formulated with the help of Count Dooku, and therefore was sure to work on even the strongest of Jedi. You knew deep down it was only a taunt, yet upon seeing you Obi Wan seemed very...open. 

It takes a great deal of effort and no small amount of force manipulation to get Obi Wan onto the ship with the drones shooting at you. 

“Will Master Obi Wan be alright?” Anakin asks from the cockpit of the ship as you help Obi Wan lie down on the only bunk in the ship. 

“He’ll be fine, Ani,” you answer despite the nervousness building in your own chest. The last thing Anakin needed to hear was anything upsetting. You liked the apprentice well enough, but his volatile nature made you nervous, especially in times of distress. 

“Th-thank you,” Obi Wan stutters. “I would have died without you.” 

“Surely you would’ve found a way to escape.” 

He watches you with admiration filling those beautiful eyes of his. There was something oddly intimate about the whole situation. Anakin was busy flying the ship, so lost in his unnecessary panic he might as well have been in a different world from you and Obi Wan. Obi Wan laid his hand on your knee. He was weak and almost delirious from whatever Grievous pumped him full of. Yet his face changed when you brushed a strand of auburn hair out of his face. There was a sweetness in him you weren’t used to seeing. 

“You’re magnificent,” he whispers, “So-so beautiful.” 

“You’re delirious” you tease him. 

“You’re still beautiful,” he reaches over to touch your cheek softly. 

“Shut up, Obi Wan,” you take his hand away from your face.

“I’ve wanted to tell you for as long as I’ve known you, and now you silence me,” he says with a smirk. 

“Perhaps when you’re less delirious we can talk about it. In the meantime get some rest.”

“You really are magnificent,” he tells you again. 

You stand up, and nudge him to lie down completely. Whispering absently about him needing to rest in order to avoid the praise he was so determined to bestow. His green eyes stayed glued to your face, not missing a single thing. He sees how your eyes can’t help but take him in, and how your face softens when he brushes his hand against yours. You reach out to cover him up with a blanket. You touch his cheek and he leans into your touch. You wonder if he will later come to regret his current lack of judgement. Your fingertips trace their way down the side of his face, moving to caress his beard. Then Anakin announces a destination and you’re pulled into reality. You fold your hands in your lap. He misses your touch as soon as it recedes

“Being a hostage makes you affectionate” you tease him. 

“I’ve always felt affection towards you. This just makes me less inclined to hide it.” He lets out a heavy sigh. “I have to tell you…”

Only you placing a soft finger over his lips stops him from saying those sweet words he wanted to say. 

“Get some rest.” 

***

You took his breath away. The soft, blue gown you wore made your eyes stand out. The way your hair was pulled up showed off your shoulders and the delicate curve of your neck. The setting Naboo sun seems to highlight your cheekbones, and your bare shoulders. Obi Wan’s heart pounds as you walk towards him. When you said you were going undercover to help protect Padme, he never would have imagined you looking so ethereal doing it. 

“I feel like I’m naked,” you whisper as soon as he’s in earshot. He laughs. 

“You look...different.” 

“Padme thought I should blend in if I was to protect her.” 

“I wouldn’t call this blending in,” he comments. His fingers absently reach out for the soft chiffon fabric. 

“If it helps me stay close enough to thwart assasination attempts I’d wear this dress forever.”

“You sound like Anakin,” Obi Wan shakes his head. “He’s fighting a bout of jealousy because you’re here with her instead of him.” 

“She’s a good person, hence why someone wants her dead.” 

“She’s a politician.” 

“And you’re a Jedi, we all have our labels. They don’t define us.” 

He lets out a sigh. More and more he finds it harder to keep a grip on the reality of the situation. When the two of you speak like this, he can’t decide if he adores you or if you’re a risk to be around. Perhaps both somehow intertwined. The very things he adores about you are the same things that keep you from being part of the council. He can feel you’re frustrated with him, and he wonders if it should stay this way. 

“Why are you here, Obi Wan?” you ask him finally. 

He’s quiet for a long time. It wouldn’t be hard to confess now with seeing you this way and being on this lush beautiful planet together. Nobody would hear except you, and if all else fails he could simply leave if you don’t feel the same way. 

“I just wanted to check on you,” he lies. “I wanted to make sure you’re faring well here.” 

“I’m doing fine.” You look down at the ground, “I do miss you though.” 

His breath catches, and then he swallows softly. 

“Ani too!” you add to try to ease the awkwardness created by your confession. 

“Of course,” he sighs. 

You step closer to him, so close he can smell the sweet perfume you were wearing. He breathes in deeply. 

“But mostly you,” you whisper. 

He closes the remaining gap between the two of you, taking your mouth with his. Everything he struggled to put into words is slowly revealed in his kiss and his touch. He wraps his arms around you, and allows his fingertips to trace against your bare back. You sigh against his lips, and send his brain into a spiral of intrusively sinful thoughts. You pull away, and both of you giggle. 

“The council definitely wouldn’t approve,” you tease him.

“They don’t have to know,” he says. “Just like they don’t need to know that I love you.” 

“You love me?” 

He smiles, “I always have.” 

“I love you too,” you whisper. 

He pulls you back into a tight embrace, and peppers kisses along your cheeks. The two of you stay tangled as though trying to makeup for all the lost time. He may not know what will happen once he leaves Naboo, but he knows he wants to spend every second until then with you. 


End file.
